Where has time gone?

I found the letter below the other day in my scrapbooking stuff. Years ago, I made a copy to put in Austin’s scrapbook to go with his ‘first day of school’ pictures. Now, he is about to graduate high school in just a few months and I am trying to figure out where the time went. I think I cried harder the first day of kindergarten than he did. I remember calling in sick to work that day because I was so upset after leaving him. Now as we begin preparations for graduation, the tears come and go again. Mostly, they’re tears of joy when I think about all he has become and all he is yet to be. I am confident in his abilities because he is confident in who he is in Christ. My heart swells with pride and joy when I see Austin share his love for Jesus and grow in his own personal relationship with God. To see him worship with abandon thrills me to no end.

I am thankful that I was allowed the opportunity to raise this child and that he has become the wonderful young man that he is. He’s still growing up and has a ways to go, but he has a great start on this crazy journey called Life and I know he’ll do well. I pray that he continues to grow in the grace and spirit of our Lord and that he will always be a light to others. I pray that his heart is guarded; protected from those who mean him harm. I pray that he knows 2 or 3 amazing friends in his life that he knows he can always rely on for prayer, support, friendship, and need. I pray that one day, he will truly understand the love we have for him as his parents and how proud we are of him.

August 10, 1998

Dear World,

     My son starts school today. It’s going to be strange and new to him for a while. And I wish you would sort of treat him gently.

     You see, up to now, he’s been king of the roost. He’s been boss of the back yard. I have always been around to repair his wounds, and to soothe his feelings.

     But now—things are going to be different.

     This morning, he’s going to walk down the front steps, wave his hand, and start on his great adventure that will probably include wars, tragedy, and sorrow.

    To live his life in the world he has to live in will require faith and love and courage.

     So, World, I wish you would sort of take him by his young hand and teach him the things he will have to know. Teach him—but gently, if you can. Teach him that for every scoundrel there is a hero; that for every crooked politician there is a dedicated leader; that for every enemy there is a friend. Teach him the wonders of books.

     Give him quiet time to ponder the eternal mystery of birds in the sky, bees in the sun, and flowers on the green hill.    Teach him it is far more honorable to fail than to cheat.

     Teach him to have faith in his own ideas, even if everyone else tells him they are wrong. Teach him to sell his brawn and brains to the highest bidder, but never to put a price on his heart and soul.

    Teach him to close his ears to a howling mob…and to stand and fight if he thinks it’s right.

   Teach him gently, World, but don’t coddle him, because only the test of fire makes fine steel.

  This is a big order, World, but see what you can do. He’s such a nice little fellow.

(Author unknown)
Little did I know at the time I was preparing this for his scrapbook that he would face some of the tragedies and sorrows that he has. He saw the confusion and fear on 9/11 and the days to follow; the uncertainty when we, as a nation, went back to war. He went through the loss of 3 great grandparents, 2 dear friends and even more recently a grandmother. There was little I could do but offer comfort, security, and love during those times but I know he has grown stronger and wiser for each of them. My desire to take the pain and fear away completely was, of course, not met. It is not for us here on earth to do.

So, my letter to the World now would be quite similar. I would add:

Be kind to my ‘little boy’. Teach him gently, but don’t coddle him. Help him to see the joys in the little things as well as the big. Help him embrace his future with full force and with a faith in God that no one or nothing can break. Keep his heartbreak to a minimum but let him grow from each and every experience. Allow him to grow and continue to become the Man of God that he was designed to be.